Sunday, February 22, 2009


i haven't felt like doing much blogging although there's a lot going on right now that i could blog about and i'm sure i'll get around to eventually (maybe), but doing tags is easy for my brain at the moment so here goes another.

mindy tagged me with this sweet one: it's called "hooked on your blog" and i'm not really sure i understand the image that goes with it as there really is not a link to anything...anyway...

six things that add to my happiness and joy!! i'm going to go with what is on my mind in this moment:

1. it was warm and sunny yesterday so the kids and i went for a walk around the neighborhood.

2. early morning love-making.

3. we have a huge, and i mean really huge (think 15), group of cedar waxwings living near our house now that swoop around the bushes and trees all the time.

4. the boys are playing some wild and silly game right now called "WoW meets crazy idea that samuel had meets harry potter entrance exam and quoting youtube videos" with costumes and everything.

5. sadie figured out a cool way to use her old tights, so she just now brought me some scissors and had me cut them off for sleeve/wrist warmers...and she's really happy with them. she's now pulling ALL of her tights out to see which ones she wants to do next!

6. i'm looking out the window and it's snowing. and although i really don't like the cold, there is something simply beautiful about new-fallen snow. and it reminds me of how cozy our life is inside our house and how lucky we are to be here together everyday.

okay, now here is the fun part...tagging...who shall i tag??? is it 5 people? okay...

jessica, who never fails to surprise me and make me smile (thanks for the bag!!).
ren, who is like a big sister to me as well as a friend (you can be both apparently).
cheryl, who i really miss being best friends with and living in the same town together.
kelli, who i am just getting to know although we've met several times.
brenna, who married the man i didn't and shares the best stuff on her blog.

Sunday, February 15, 2009

25 random things about me...

okay so i got tagged by a couple people on facebook to do this note thingy and i finally got around to doing it and decided to put it on my blog as well.

1. love & hate minutiae: i love when it's raining and you go under a bridge and it's suddenly really quiet for just a split second before you drive back into the pouring rain...i love that quiet part. i hate when health foods/products companies use the phrase "it's a totally organic experience" in their slogans.

2. i used to live in a really rural place called hiltons, virginia...most people know that is where the carter family fold is...and that we are sort of related to the carters, by marriage not blood.

3. i had 2 nicknames in high and catfight. i still go by la. catfight was because a friend said that's what my hair looked like, like a catfight happened on my head.

4. i walked many many many blocks home alone from school in the snow when i was 5 or 6. no one was home and i fell asleep on the porch. when i woke up i walked to a neighbor's house and she put me on the couch with blankets and warm tomato soup. to this day, i hate the cold. and i love tomato soup and crackers.

5. i haven't felt like dancing or doing art in months.

6. i take lots of pictures because i worry i won't remember things...and that is mostly true, i do forget a lot, always have.

7. almost all of our furniture was found or given.

8. the only thing i still use that i learned in high school is typing.

9. i like disco...and barry manilow..............shhhhh don't tell anyone!!!

10. i often feel like i don't know anything about anything.

11. i can eat a whole bag of chips by myself!! regular lay's please!

12. when i was in high school, i went on a date with a boy named tony catron. we went to a movie and afterwards he took me to watch a tractor pull...we didn't go in though, we went up on a hill above it to watch for free.

13. there was a club in johnson city when i was in college called "the highlander" and my boyfriend and i and sometimes some other friends would go there to dance and hang out and listen to bands play. it was dirty and noisy and smoky. i loved it, i miss it!!

14. i don't ever ever ever need to drink to have a good time or to be able to get out on a dance floor!

15. i've never tried any kind of drug...not even marijuana. but when i was in the 8th grade, i was the class clown and super hyper, and my boyfriend was a known druggy...everyone assumed i was too.

16. i never eat anything for breakfast but fruit.

17. i rarely think of myself as a grown up. i used to think i'd start feeling grown up when i turned 30, then when that didn't happen i started thinking maybe at that i'm getting closer to 40, i'm thinking that i will probably always feel like a kid.

18. when i was in the third grade, i was tested for a gifted program. i did not make it in; i was lacking in library skills they said. my best friend made it though, and she went on to be in a different third grade class leaving me behind. i think about that sometimes, walking out of the school building feeling so sad and like a failure and it is one of the very few memories I have from that time.

19. i have a longing to belong. the need for community. but it is also the core of one of my deepest inner conflicts. the need to belong and the need to not belong. i often feel like i can't handle the belonging. that i don't have enough of me to go i'm often happiest when my "community" is very very tiny. if it tries to get bigger i tend to freak out. and then the longing comes is a terrible cycle, round and round i go...wanting and not wanting, needing and not needing.

20. i cheated on 18 and 19 because i got stumped and couldn't think of anything to write so i randomly pulled up really really old blog posts...and snipped from them.

21. i'm listening to sondre lerche's song "after all" and it makes me smile. he is yummy.

22. winter makes me want to curl up in a blanket on the couch and watch movies or read and eat, eat, eat!!!

23. i keep everything!!

24. i share more of myself than i should sometimes. this makes me a very vulnerable person. i am also a pretty naive person as well.

25. i really like my life right now, even though i have the winter blahs.

26. i can't believe i finished this!! that's just an extra one for me ;0) you don't have to do 26!

the rules that came with it in case you're curious what this is about:
Rules (but I would prefer to call them "Suggestions"):Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to (IF YOU WANT TO, OF COURSE) write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it's because I want to know more about you.
Of course, you don't HAVE to do any of this, only if you feel like it'd be fun!!!!)Share

Sunday, February 08, 2009

blog awards

i've never gotten one of these before so it took me some time to get to figuring out what to do with it and how =).

thank you danielle

These are the rules to accept the award:
1. You have to pick 5 blogs that you consider deserving of this award for their creativity, design, interesting material, and also contribute to the blogging community, no matter what language.
2. Each award has to have the name of the author and a link to his/her blog to be visited by everyone.
3. Each award winner has to show the award and put the name and link to the blog that presented her/him with the award.
4.The award winner and one who has given the prize have to show the link of "Arte y Pico" blog so everyone will know the origin of this award.
5. To show these rules
back when tagging was going around, i never could think of any people to tag. i actually had to narrow down this list to get my 5...and it was hard!!
jess is an amazing inspiration to me as a mother, friend and artist.
cheryl never fails to impress me with her outstanding knowledge and creativity.
mindy is a brilliant dancer and an unshakable, grounded human being.
robyn makes the most beautiful dolls ever.
ginger whose henna creations are astounding...and she knits yummy socks too!!

Wednesday, February 04, 2009

beds beds beds, an adventure in sleeping arrangements

well, after years of talking about it...we finally got bunkbeds for the boys. samuel's camper room wasn't working out for the winter. even though he wasn't sleeping out there, all his stuff and his art desk were out there and it limited how much he felt like drawing. he felt isolated. and cold. so we moved all his stuff back in and got the room arranged and ready for bunkbeds. we then moved our 13 year old king size out onto the porch for pickup today by salvation army, and moved the boys' double bed into our room. we slept on it the first night and knew that it was too small for me, scotty, and sadie. so last night, i made up the couch next to the bed for sadie. i slept so good. like i haven't in years. the double bed is so comfortable, the mattress is firmer and not all dead like our king. and our room seems bigger now too!!! the boys are enjoying having their own beds and the extra floor space as well...anyone see the movie "step brothers"...LOL..."why did you let us do that????" i'm cracking up!! --->> bunk beds scene from step brothers

and now for another song...with sadie making that beginning transition out of our bed, i'm thinking about all the years of having the kids in bed with us. waking up to see their little sleeping faces, smiling in a dream, or drooling. and spooning. all beautiful. i will miss that...

Morning Lullabies
by Ingrid Michaelson

I woke up
With your head on my arm
My hand was numb
Circulation gone
But I dared not move the pretty sleeping one
The sun had painted
Patterns on your face
As you breathed Sunday air
You rolled onto
My open arm
I became your pillow; you let me smooth your hair

I will sing you morning lullabies
You are beautiful and peaceful this way
I know you have to close your eyes on everyone
Let me help you, I'll sing you to sleep
With morning lullabies

Let me lie in the curve
Of your body tonight
And I will hear you tumble into sleep
I will watch you heal, watch you heal with me

I will sing you morning lullabies
You are beautiful and peaceful this way
I know you have to close your eyes on everyone
Let me help you, I'll sing you to sleep
With morning lullabies
I know you have to close
Your eyes on everyone
Let me help you, I'll sing you to sleep
With morning lulla-bye, bye, baby
Close your eyes and I will sing you
Morning lullabies
And I will sing you
Morning lullabies

from laughing to is amazing that way!!


Sunday, February 01, 2009

in my head, in my songs

i feel very much inside the songs i'm listening to lately, especially today. sometimes i just get really inside my head listening. and feeling. this past year brought with it so many joys and so many sorrows. i find that i'm a little swallowed up by the emotions of both, conflicting and swirling around in my heart, making me sway, cry, laugh, and SING. so i'm sharing lyrics today. it's a good day for lyrics. later, i will go to a birthday party and be with many people that i love. it is good to love. it is good to feel, even when it hurts. but it is especially good to love and be loved.

by Danny Schmidt

When I die, let them judge me by my company of friends
Let them know me as the footprints that I left upon the sand
Let them laugh for all the laughter
Let them cry for laughter’s end
But when I die, let them judge me by my company of friends

When I die, let them toast to all the things that I believe
Let them raise a glass to consciousness
And not spill a drop for grief
Let the bubbles rise at midnight
Let their tongues get light as thieves
And when I die, let them toast to all the things that I believe

I believe in restless hunger
I believe in red balloons
I believe in private thunder
In the end I do believe

I believe in inspiration
I believe in lightning bugs
I believe in slow creation
In the end I do believe

I believe in ink on paper
I believe in lips on ears
I believe what's shared is savored
In the end I do believe

I believe in work on Sundays
I believe in raising barns
I believe in wasting Mondays
In the end I do believe

I believe in intuition
I believe in being wrong
I believe in contradiction
In the end I do believe

I believe in living smitten
I believe all hearts will mend
I believe our book is written
By our company of friends

When Mac Was Swimming
by The Innocence Mission

When Mac was swimming, I was running late,
walking around New Orleans looking for a birthday cake.
It was a great surprise to him so many people came.
Nobody knows, darling.
Nobody knows how they are loved.
Don't worry, my darling, the sun's coming up.

Let's get up early now, dive clear into the day.
Let's get out of the car with open arms,
not wait to be embraced.
The flowers that grew, the things that happened
since the day you came.
Nobody knows, darling.
Nobody knows how they are loved.
Don't worry, my darling, the sun's coming up.Share